if i don't miss the life i used to lead, why do i still hurt?

if i don't miss the life i used to lead, why do i still hurt? i know many of the decisions i made were wrong, and i will not make them again. however, why can't i just move on? i know healing is necessary, and it'll probably just take time. but i'm growing impatient, and most of my friends can only take a certain amount of me talking about my "ex" before i becoming annoying or they give advice like it'll take time or people think i'm a freak for still thinking about him. i'm at a point where i don't long for jeff. i'm not at a point where i long for companionship. someone i can share my soul with. it's different with friends. and i'm going to wait until it's the right person. i'm just saying... i'm growing impatient. God, give me strength when i feel that i don't have it. i want to be completely Yours.

love,

alli